yesterday i awoke with billy idol's 'rebel yell' stuck in some oblique synaptic groove. not knowing this to be a good thing or not, i immediately went on a billy idol safari (i hadn't yet remembered the name of the tune, so i received snapshots of a few collatoral billys too). i tell you, it was a very good thing. it did, however, exert some influence on my having slapped Reality with the proverbial glove. i'm quite certain this was foolish: it was wednesday, which is delivery day in montreal, and for some reason also the day that an atypical amount of weirdos (which is to say more than usual) roam the streets. as far as i can tell there is no solidarity amongst the amorphous legion of Reality Resistors. everyone's engaged in a private scuffle with the fabric of their own making. so my personal rally was simply absorbed by the peripheral maniacal mayhem. hmmm, fabric of Reality... perhaps i need to consult a tailor... get a camo-suit made or something.
today i only have questions:
1. where oh where might my Dad be? Bex and i ruminated over that one for a slice. we reckon on holiday, but it's a little difficult to chart his globetrotting movements. though i am concerned, i miss the fellow. i also need to consult him over his kenyan relief agency. more info to follow on that one.
2. does anyone else smell that? i've been having strange, untraceable smells lately, quite complex and flowery. not those burnt-popcorn, about-to-have-a-seizure ones, but real brief and haunting. strange. maybe i'm wishing for an early spring, or maybe it's just time to replace my olfactory bulb with an energy saver.
3. if christopher reeve is really dead, how come there's a new superman movie coming out? huh? i bet a brandnew biggie tune's on the soundtrack.
4. how many hiccoughs can there be in throwing a simple, bleed-from-the-ears after-party? we just had our 'launch' for Rawkiss Kneebuckler Productions fall around our ankles. fuckknobs!!!
5. steve martin as inspecter clousseau? um... what next? ashton kutcher as citizen kane?
6. anyone ever google something sad like 'ashton kutcher' or 'jennifer aniston' before, just to get the correct spelling, and then felt excessively guilty everytime google prompts you their names forever afterwards? like, what if someone ever borrows your computer? how freaking awkward! they've built entire 30 minute-long sitcoms on less of a plot...
7. if you tell a very dear friend a bold-faced lie, but out of general embarassment of how they may alter their opinion of you based one the truth, can it really be excusable? especially when the truth has been one currency that neither have ever defaulted on? the lie multip-lies too. i'm completely em-bare-assed here. Eve, if you're reading this, then you already know how i deceived you. even when i spoke to you today, i got the impression you knew. as i told Isabel, you sounded deflated when we said our goodbyes. and i'm immensely sorry. i will tell you soon.
this Tommy's totally bummed. Reality, this is the sound of me tapping the mat.