Wednesday, December 06, 2006
I have a habit of putting things in my pockets. Since the smoking ban here, I've taken to squeezing out the last of the tabacco of each smoke and pocketing the filter for later refuse. This is my environmental stand. It only really makes my pants smell (as I readily forget about them, they tend to build up) and probably contributes to global warming more than it helps curtail littering (people start avoiding me, creating additional greenhouse gases in their efforts etc., therefore avoidance = global warming). The problem is, each pocket has become a not-very-nice environment in and of itself.. on any given day you might find (which would lead me to say 'I can feel that, why are you looking in my pocket?'): half open sachet of pepper (just in case I need to use the other half later... what?), bottle caps, another cigarette filter (please, these aren't butts, important distinction I feel), coffee stir sticks, a hell-phone bill, a fork, pen & paper, not my wallet, someone else's lighter, wire, a necklace, and these days cold fingers.
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10 comments:
You lighter thief you...and Tom...that's DISGUSTING
I have to agree with lindz...
Use an old cigarette pack as a butt-collector.
Maybe you should start buying pants without pockets?
Or why don't you buy a pocket ashtray...they do have those, you know?? They're very cute.
you told me that smell was my cologne the last time i was up. and to think you had me feeling all bad and self-conscious about myself.
poo on you... not literally.
(that wasn't the smell was it?)
hahahahaha. or pockets without pants.. i guess that would be a fannypack?
last year, between classes, i pulled a successful one handed match-book trick (a la Joe Camel, where one folds a still-attached match all the way over edge and rubs it quickly on the sandpaper... all done with one thumb - good for cell-phone smokers). feeling that small warmth of cool-smugness it's supposed to induce, i closed the match-book and put it back in my pocket. then i felt more than warmth, in fact i felt full-on flaming, pant-searing shock. i'd not blown out the match, and the whole book'd caught light! so, there i was mid-campus, dancing up and down with fire coming out of my pocket. i sat in my class reeking of sulphur feeling like the worlds biggest wally! no more pockets!
Man, I wish you had that on video... made me laugh waaaay out loud! Thanks for making my morning.
Thinking of your mishap and feeling like a wally, I'll tell you my brief story. Picture this, seventh grade and being the new kid in school I was trying to act cool on the baseball diamond. I was swinging the bat around over my head and clocked myself soo hard I saw stars. Hoping no one noticed, I walked, albeit sideways, back to the bench feeling like a tool. That experience officially ended any hope of a career in baseball.
IMHO: I think if you go around town wearing nothing and a fanny pack you have bigger problems than merely setting yourself on fire. I dunno, just a thought.
MG- me too wish i had it on video. it was literally a thigh-slapper. hahahaha re: the bonking yourself on the head! if you can remember the incident, it seems everything turned out just fine. i'd've liked to've seen that, as the funniest part is people trying to pick up their broken cool afterwards.
i've hit myself on the head in every sport i've ever done: swimming (backstroke), rugby, capoeira, walking around, raving, biking, skiing, tennis, football, volleyball, soccer.. woah, i didn't know i've done so many sports, must've forgotten somehow.. makes me look like a bit of a numbskull, but each time REALLY. HURT.
reminds me of the time that i asked you for your lighter.... you handed it to me .... so i looked down and saw writing on the side of the lighter...............it read, 'dave's lighter, Tom do not steal!!!...." hahhahahahahahahahah................. who knows where that is now...... dave sure as frick doesn't have ot though!
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