Wednesday, May 10, 2006

more diverse than your mother

I've always wanted to go up to a member of the clergy and ask to speak to his supervisor. I have no idea who I'd be introduced to.. Jesus, their founding CEO, took waaay early retirement; their current Press Secretary is a creepy German who looks like his kidneys migrated up to his eyelids; all the other guys in middle management seem to be caught up in some kinda pyramid scheme.. actually, the only reason I'd ask would be to see the guy's reaction. It's probably the best scam ever created: a life-long investment for a product that happens only when you're dead.. (I think the quarrel I'd present the super is that I'd want to sign on terms that allow the transmigration of soul BEFORE I died). I really do wonder who'd come from out back: "Hello, my son, I am ___" the A&W bear? Tom Cruise? George Lucas' neck fat?

@ @ @
For some time, I've been reminiscing over Diversity Fest, a 3-day island party Kim, Meghan and I went to last summer. No words really exist to capture it. It was on Texada Island, a tiny spit of land a 15 minute ferry from Powell River, just off the coast of mainland BC. Hippies and ravers and contortionists and all people tribal were there, and traipsed between 4 stages of continual music. My favourite label was represented by Adham Shaikh, a psy-tribal deej who made my feet bleed. Suns set to Fire Hurlers (particularly fire Marshal, a guy who lives in Cowichan Bay, and delivers great barn afterparties there, where he'll twirl fire atop a decommisioned missile launcher. Awesome.) Mornings were met by crashing waves and naked hippies swimming. Sleep was best had during the morning. AND THERE WAS A PIEROGI BAR!! The beats were fat, the jam-bands were hot, there were didjeridoo workshops, there were Jewish gypsy youths that played some mean folk, stoneds extras from Mad Max movies (walking up a path, I saw some guy wearing welding goggles standing abreast of my route. He wasn't paying any attention to me, only to what he was holding. He put a pipe up to his mouth, and then placed a magnifying glass in a device attached to the pipe, twiddled with a tuning bolt, and lit his pipe with the power of the sun. What a fucking hippie.), Meghan bartered for everything, food, clothes, beads etc., as she carried a particular commodity that proved very popular amongst the peddlars. Overall, it was an AMAZING time, and Kim and I have made a pact of sorts to attend again this summer. I implore anyone who is interested to look into going. You'll be so much cooler when it's over. Oh, and itchier.

2 comments:

Isabel said...

My brother added a new possible name to his list of cat names:

Tomasa.

Funny. It is a real spanish name for a girl. Usually Tomasina, though. I still thought it was funny.

Anonymous said...

Thomas... How long it has been! I feel compelled to make this poetic because, having today read through all your intimate thoughts over the past months, I've been inspired to infuse all my writings with whimsical imagery and strange and curious compound words. Sadly though, the context in which I most often write does not welcome this type of creativity: I feel my "corpoclients" and enslavers would watch me with a crooked eye henceforth.

So I'll dumb it down. I suppose I'm a bit of a blast from your past! I actually found your blog through a google search for "Marc Guillet" who, the last time I saw him in Montreal was wading in a chemically induced haze. But he is one of our common links, as it happens, which should be a bit of a clue. Further information - your reminiscence of bike scars is particularly relevant, not to mention your high-school writings... Just so this doesn't seem creepy I'll throw out an extra bit of information that no random goon might have - Kingsford Pl.

Also, to keep the mystery thick, I'll give you my alias email that I reserve for the scum-of-the-earth websites that sell your soul for financial gain to the highest bidder begetting torrents of "PEXIS ENH4N$MENT" type emails...

Send me an email so I have your address and I can fanfarishly expose my true identity!

thinkbeforedoing@hotmail.com