Wednesday, May 17, 2006

if i had a head made of wood (i estimate only a few more dedicated nights at the biftek), i'd carve out a bat-box. you'd have to speak quietly to me, or else i'd be forced to shoosh you, or spit an angry bat at you. "you remember what happened last time you yelled at me, Blinky got the runs and i oozed guano out of my nose for a half hour afterwards." i think i'd also have matching doorknobs for ears. that'd be nice.

this is just stupid, what am i saying? no-one respects people with doorknobs for ears. i have really little ears right now, so if i get any kind of ear-augmentation at all, i'd go for a pair of boobs. that'd be nicer. i'd probably get to about 7 or even 6 on the 'best Montreal weirdo' in next year's BOM. #7 Wood-headed, bat-filled, B-cups for ears guy.

2 comments:

Amy said...

i wish i had doorknobs for ears too.....

came across this site. thought you might like it if you hadn't seen it already...

http://www.we-make-money-not-art.com/archives/cat_architecture.php

Anonymous said...

Tom!! Jack the bearded tricycle guy - aka one of my favorite Carre St. Louis regulars - made number 5 on BOM's Montreal Weirdos!! I had no idea!! I feel like I should send him flowers or something. That's the most exciting thing I've read all day.