Sunday, December 02, 2007

I read somewhere that Will Smith had recently divorced and posted his profile on Millionairematch.com
That meant it was ok for me to sign up, so I did. If only to take a peak at "I, Will Smith". Perusing it while I ate take-out Phad Thai, I found it to have a delightful inital pr[e/o]mise: "#1 site for finding wealthy men and gorgeous girls, and women."
After squeezing the lime and sprinkling some peanuts on my noodles, I went and initiated a profile. Soon I was finding 39 year-old girls from LA, FL and Oakville, ON and guys from NY or TX or NY. But I soon discovered that if I truly wanted to email them I'd have to be a Gold member. All I wanted to do was see Will, so I typed in Will for a match. I got sirwilliam, willgivethisatry, willowyblonde, and WILLtoPOWER (who co-wrote the 1989 smash: Baby, I love your way). So I tried Smith and got Smithers123 or something.
And then I got bored of looking at 39 year-old social drinkers who are confident and compassionate and merely very good looking and looking for 22-22.5 year old spontaneous homebodies who love children (working for them), and stopped.

3 comments:

Princess Pointful said...

That is very much something I would do.

I think I wrote once before about my weird fascination with personal ads- they seem to just crystallize stereotypes and interpersonal dynamics so well in short form.

I want the scoop when you find Mr. Smith.

Anonymous said...

Dad says: call Dad!

jordan said...

wheremunculus